Vibrators For Women Over 40

For the first 40 years of my life, I never really considered using a sex toy. I didn’t have trouble orgasming alone or with my husband, so what would be the point? And to be honest, the idea of having a non-human object make contact with my genitals during sex just felt … weird. If I wanted a cold, unfamiliar object inside me, I could go to the gynecologist for that. Hard pass.

Those of you who use sex toys on the regular must think I’m bonkers, right? What’s the big deal? I know, but that’s just how I felt. After 40 years of enjoying sex and masturbation without sex toys and feeling quite satisfied, the thought of introducing something new into the mix simply seemed unnecessary – and maybe a bit of a nuisance. “I’m too old for that,” I thought.

But that became the exact reason I decided to go for it. The older I get, the more set in my ways I become. I hesitate to try new things, meet new people, or explore new places—let alone put new vibrating toys into my body. And that is not the kind of middle-aged woman I want to be.

So, soon after my 41st birthday, I decided to bring home a few new friends (which were kindly gifted to me for review purposes). The first was the Viva Senna Sonic Clitoral Stimulator, a sleek and elegant device designed for clitoral stimulation. Its compact shape made it look like it could double as a discreet back massager!

The second, also from the Savvy Viva collection, was the Donna G-Spot and Clit Vibrator. This one promised to provide dual stimulation, hitting both the clitoris and the G-spot simultaneously.

Finally, there was the Sylas, a flexible vibrator that could be shaped to stimulate the clitoris, G-spot, or both at once, depending on how you bent it. It was incredibly versatile and could be used solo or with a partner for added fun.

I’ll be honest—it took me forever to take these toys out of their boxes. I was a bit tech-phobic and overwhelmed at the thought of figuring out how to charge them. Where was I supposed to charge them without my curious kids finding them? It was stressful and definitely not sexy.

But I finally got it done. Actually, I had to ask my husband to take over the charging process, which felt ironic and kind of hilarious. I guess if I was going to try these toys out, someone had to get them ready!

The first toy I tried was the Viva Senna Sonic Clitoral Stimulator. I tested it out with my husband, and while it was fun at first, I found it a little too intense. Despite adjusting the settings, I couldn’t get the balance right, and it started feeling more irritating than pleasurable. Using my own hands, which I’ve always done, felt way more satisfying.

Next, I gave the Viva Milana a shot. While I didn’t love it for clitoral stimulation, I did enjoy the way it worked for internal use. It’s perfect if you’re looking for targeted G-spot stimulation and aren’t as focused on full penetration. Still, it didn’t have the fullness I personally prefer, so it wasn’t quite right for me.

By now, you’re probably thinking I’m a complete sex toy failure. But actually, I had better luck with the Donna G-Spot and Clit Vibrator. I used it solo, and it was fantastic. The G-spot stimulator hit the exact spot I like, providing that extra fullness I’ve always wished for during masturbation. The only minor annoyance was having to push aside the clitoral attachment, but overall, it was an awesome experience.

Would I use it again? Maybe. The reality is, as a busy mom, I don’t get many chances to masturbate, and when I do, it’s usually quick. Plus, I’m not always up for the post-session cleanup, even though it’s pretty simple. But still, the Donna left a lasting impression—it even made its way into one of my dreams, which I thought was pretty cute. Maybe that means I’m warming up to it!

Although my experience wasn’t a home run with every product, it was definitely positive. I learned that finding the right sex toy takes a bit of trial and error, and that everyone’s preferences are different. I initially assumed I’d prefer clitoral stimulators over vaginal ones because that’s what many of my friends like—but I discovered that’s not the case for me.

Most importantly, I learned that trying new things—whether they’re new foods, new experiences, or even new toys—is a great way to keep life interesting, especially as I get older.